If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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