i can't believe i had my finger in that
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
