so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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