Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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