every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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