There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
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