its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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