new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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