Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
