his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
soo... how was my night?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize