We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
