i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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