I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
