Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
