I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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