those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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