I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
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