Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize