The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
