Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
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