sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
