You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
