sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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