I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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