I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize