So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
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