we're blogging at a bar
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
