what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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