i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
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