She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize
