he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
