I want to walk on stilts...naked
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Randomize