I look better un-naked...
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
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