i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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