so explain again why im purple
no
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
