More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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