I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
