I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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