i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Randomize
