Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize