sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
