Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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