i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
