You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
