we made out on top of his cat.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
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I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
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Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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