Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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