...so i touched it.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
