so that wasnt chicken after all
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
