she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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