her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
