I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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