u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize